Have you ever felt resistance? Maybe you’ve felt stuck in a relationship or job. The job seems ideal, the relationship ticks all the boxes, but something inside you feels off. You procrastinate, delay decisions, or wake up with dread instead of excitement. Why?
This feeling of resistance is often misunderstood. It’s easy to dismiss it as laziness or fear, but what if it’s something deeper? What if resistance is your Quiet Voice; the still, small voice of wisdom trying to speak to you?
Resistance as a Messenger
Resistance isn’t always bad. In fact, it can be a powerful signal from your inner self that something isn’t aligned with your truth. On the surface, everything may look fine – the job pays well, your partner is wonderful, and the project fits your skill set perfectly. But deep down, your body and mind might be saying, “No, this isn’t right for me.”
Psychologist Carl Rogers famously said, “What is most personal is most universal.” This means that the discomfort you feel isn’t random, it’s deeply connected to your authentic self. Ignoring it can lead to burnout, unhappiness, or even physical symptoms like fatigue and anxiety.
How to Listen to Your Quiet Voice
Listening to your Quiet Voice takes effort and practice. Here’s how you can begin:
1. Get Quiet
Start by creating space for stillness. This doesn’t mean emptying your mind but rather quieting external distractions so you can hear what’s happening inside. Mindfulness practices like meditation or deep breathing can help you tune into your inner world.
2. Ask Questions
Grab a journal or notebook and write down questions like:
- What am I feeling right now?
- What do I want that I’m not admitting to myself?
- What feels off about this situation?
Begin with positive observations about your current situation, “I like this job because…” or “I enjoy this relationship because…” Pay attention to any feelings of discomfort that arise as you write. If something doesn’t feel completely true, follow that thread.
For example, you might write, “I love working with such a great team,” but feel a pang of unease. Ask yourself why. Is there tension with a colleague? Do you feel disconnected from the company’s mission? Or is it something bigger, perhaps you know deep down this isn’t where you want to be?
3. Get Real
Be brutally honest with yourself. Acknowledging resistance often means facing uncomfortable truths – calling off a relationship, quitting a job, or admitting that a course or career doesn’t excite you anymore. As Brené Brown says, “Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing we’ll ever do.”
Resistance vs Fear
It’s important to distinguish between resistance rooted in fear and resistance rooted in truth. Stephen Pressfield’s The War of Art offers valuable insight on this topic. He argues that resistance often arises when we’re pursuing something meaningful, our passion or purpose, and that the greater the resistance, the more reason to push forward.
But not all resistance is fear-based. Sometimes it’s your Quiet Voice urging you to stop and reassess because what you’re doing isn’t aligned with who you truly are. The key is learning to discern between these two types of resistance:
- Fear-based resistance: Feels like avoidance but stems from self-doubt or fear of failure (e.g., starting a creative project).
- Truth-based resistance: Feels like unease or discomfort because something isn’t right for you (e.g., staying in a mismatched relationship).
Aligning with Your Truth
When you listen to your Quiet Voice and act in alignment with your truth, life begins to flow more naturally. The unease dissipates because your actions reflect your authentic self. Yes, it may be uncomfortable at first; calling off a relationship or quitting a job can feel daunting, but ultimately, it leads to greater peace and fulfilment.
Remember, you are the only person who knows your truth.
Ready to live life on your terms? Read more blog posts from Step Into Me and find the courage to be true to yourself.